When I wrote my first novella If it looks like … a pig, did I have a clue I was essentially describing the relationship with a narcissist? Absolutely not! What I thought was just a womanizer, was a narcissist. It was not until the discovery of the many blogs about narcissism, narcissistic men and narcissistic abuse did I realize I was describing the characteristics of narcissistic behavior. A blog that was insightful and on point — http://esteemology.com. She nailed it!
You know something is wrong. You don’t know what’s wrong. You can’t put your finger on what you’re feeling. You cannot describe it. But, your intuition is telling you something is not right. This man is wrong for you. Your intuition, that gut of your’s is telling you something is amiss. You owe it to yourself to determine its origin.
Women beware of the man described in If it looks like … a pig. He is not a pig. He is not a womanizer. He is a narcissist. A misogynist, An individual suffering from a bona fide personality disorder. Your relationship with him will leave you in complete and total disarray.
When a man exhibits certain behaviors in a relationship, listen to your intuition, your gut. Your intuition is probably right. Seek counseling immediately. It helped me, it will help you. It is the best place to start. And, then forgive yourself for simply not knowing that such nefariousness exists! It exists in the form of narcissistic men, predators! They reel you in with their charm, their attentiveness and then the bottom falls out! You’re left feeling as if you’ve done something horribly wrong for someone to discard you so abruptly, so callously.
Protect yourself from the heartache that is sure to follow. Narcissists attack your self-esteem, your self-worth. You can only combat such an attack by loving yourself every single day. Begin a new love affair — this time with you! Love yourself more than you love any one human being. These are the best antidotes to ward off narcissistic men and their destructive behavior. If you love yourself with a vengeance, they cannot penetrate that wall of love you have surrounded yourself with.
What helped me in addition to the counseling were the many blogs on narcissism. Reading them, I felt I had told my own story. I began to absorb everything I could about narcissism. I wanted to understand it and what was it about me that I would allow myself to be sucked into such a reckless relationship.
Happy Valentine’s Day. Treat yourselves well.